youre lurking in front of me
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
