I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
