I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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