No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
