Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
