Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You took a bar mat shot.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize