I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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