I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
