And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
there is glitter all over my balls
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
