Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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