Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
