your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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