my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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