So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize