She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
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