So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
