Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
