I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
