i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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