is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
