I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
