I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
