That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
