So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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