Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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