you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
