So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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