You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
