i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
