Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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