i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
