My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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