i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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