You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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