Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
