oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
