I'm drive I can fine osifer
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
