God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Green mimosas i think yes
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
i believe in u and ur pee
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