i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
