Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
