he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
