Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I have feelings that need drinking.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Randomize
