was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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