hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
