Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
