Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
