WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
