if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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