I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize