if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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