I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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